We at Grown Up Recess are starting a new segment called Scenes from a Craigslist Ad, where we create dramatic scenes inspired by Craigslist ads.
[Author’s Note: I found this posting by searching “attractive” in the Rooms & Shares section of Craigslist. I highly suggest trying this sometime if you are looking for a cheap place to live and/or a bleak portrait of humanity. Please click ad below for a larger image/greater insight into the mind of a sex-starved sociopath:]
Abby: What’s wrong, sweetie?
Mark: Oh, I don’t know.
Abby: No, tell me. What’s wrong?
Mark: [hesitantly] I just feel like this apartment needs…something.
Abby: Like what? I just saw some adorable lamps at IKEA the other day.
Mark: No, it just feels so…empty.
Abby: I told you we should have gone with the bigger couch….
Mark: No, I mean, emotionally.
Abby: [surprised] Oh.
Mark: I think it needs someone else.
Abby: [excitedly] Like a baby?! Oh Mark, you can’t believe how long I’ve been waiting to become a mom…
Mark: [firmly] No. [slightly softer] I meant more like a roommate.
Abby: Or maybe a like another pet?
Mark: Sure…like another pet.
Abby: [excitedly] Jessica from work is looking for homes for her dog’s puppies. They’re so cute, especially this little brown and white male…
Mark: What about a female? Are you into females?
Abby: Yeah, I’m into females.
Mark: Would you say that you’re very into both male and females? Would you say that you’re very bi?
Abby: Um, sure, I guess. Why?
Mark: Oh, no reason.
Have a Craigslist post you want to submit to Scenes from a Craigslist Ad? Please contact us.