Arizona’s Senators Pass Risky Bill

Arizona passes a bill that made refusing the rights to human beings ok.

The Arizona State Senate debated on the topic of whether turning away people for their  homosexual beliefs would be ok. It was the most senators ever had to work: 40 seconds. After, the President of The Senate called for a vote. The bill passed 666 – 0. When the President said all those in favor, the republican’s responded, “Hate!” No one has any idea where the extra votes came from, and authorities are currently investigating the process of counting.

Senator Ant I. Christ

Rep. Sen. Ant I. Christ listening to the cons of his bill.

Rep. Sen. Ant I. Christ of Hell Springs, the bill’s author, was overheard saying as the bill passed, “Praise Satan!” When asked about the next step he declared, “Well, the war isn’t over until we can pass this in the House. I’m really hoping to alienate a certain type of person, cough cough gays cough cough, so that they will leave our state. But in all honesty, I want the gays to leave.” When asked what his problem was with the gay community Sen Ant responded, “BECAUSE!,” and ran away prancing.

Sen Ant. I Christ can be reached on his Grindr profile that has plenty of activity, but no inquires.

No comment has been returned from the gay community because they all moved out of this “f**ked up state.”

Arizona has already taken a turn for the worse. Everywhere reward posters are being put up  for Missing Gay Best Friends. Each poster has a semi blurry picture of the gay missing. Houses in Phoenix’s Downtown District are currently foreclosed. The streets are dirty and no one can find any theatre, ballet, or interior decorators.

For any questions, the Republican Party will be meeting at their central location in Arizona: Anywhere the Westboro Baptist Church is picketing.


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